Supper would be later than usual for my family on that hectic fall afternoon. Unexpected afterwork delays and equipment breakdowns had strained my nerves and made my children irritable with hunger. Deciding to make a quick and easy supper of sloppy joes on sliced bread, I put a pound of hamburger into the fry pan on the stove. The phone rang and I answered it. While talking to my husband on the phone about our respective negative experiences we’d had that day, the frying hamburger started to burn. I howled with frustration. A greasy smoke haze filled the kitchen air.
From the living room next to the kitchen, I could hear my five- and nine-year-old children playing. Short-tempered because of their hunger, and perhaps as a reflection of their mother’s palpable aggravation, they seemed to be quarreling more than playing. Finally, the fight escalated to the point of total outrage and the angry child stuttered as she shouted the ultimate insult, “You, you, you PIG SNORT!” The insulted child stomped out of the room.
The absurd insult made me chuckle. I wasn’t sure what was wrong with being a pig snort, but being called one in that tone of voice left no doubt about your lowliness and despicable existence. Laughing seemed to reset my temper for the evening. Frustrations weren’t the end of the world. I clearly recognized that my children’s irritableness was a reflection off me. I reminded myself, “The saying is true…’If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!’”
Fortunately, my children were like their father: they never stayed angry for long. When my husband finally made it home, we all sat down to eat and relax. Frazzled nerves were soothed.
When angry, most people feel the need to shout something. Often, what is shouted is blasphemy or profanity. According to research, swearing taps directly into the brain’s emotional core instead of routing through the usual language centers. It is said that is why swearing seems to dull extreme frustration or the pain of a smashed finger. Shouting “You pig snort!” was very tame compared to profanity, but I’m sure it made my daughter feel better for a time.
Some people swear all the time. There are some who are unable to say more than two sentences without using disgusting words. This works against them. Studies show that habitual swearing can deaden its emotional punch over time. They become desensitized to cuss words.
My childhood family was not in the habit of swearing. The closest my father ever came to cursing, that I know of, is whenever I helped him put the milk cows into our barn. One or another would be sure to act like she couldn’t remember which stall was hers, running instead to eat ground oats from the off-limits feed cart. Helping them remember where to go required a lot of shouting and flank-slapping. I knew Daddy had reached his frustration limit when he shouted, “This is enough to make the Pope swear!” Some nights he said, “saints” or “angels” instead.
I would think to myself, “What would be so horrible that it could make the Pope, saints or angels swear?” Apparently, greedy milk cows were on the top of Daddy’s hate list.
For people who don’t curse, other words that are not offensive need to be used to find relief when they are in a situation that is extremely upsetting. As a mother I would get frustrated and need to shout something. All I asked, was for my tween-aged daughters to tidy the house a bit before I came home from work on the weekends. Arriving home to find an orderly house made me feel calm and relaxed.
But some weekends I would walk into the house after working all day to find used cereal dishes with puddles of milk in them on the dining room table, kitchen counters covered with plates and bowls that needed to be washed, and the living room floor covered with papers, toys, and more used plates and silverware. Did I swear, scream profanities, or summon the fires of hell? No. I merely bellowed like a loving mother who had turned into a wild banshee, “This house looks like a pig blew-up in it!” My children found what I said to be very funny. Obviously, being called pigs that blew up wasn’t half as insulting as being called a pig snort!
